Showing posts with label Discipline. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Discipline. Show all posts

Defiant Kids – How to Control Defiant Children

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Controlling Defiant Kid
Why are defiant kids answering you back most of the time?  You can hear and see defiant kids bickering all the time, with their parents or siblings.  What to do with defiant children? What are the keys to controlling defiant kids?  This article will give practical suggestions to help out parents on handling their angry children.

Why are defiant kids always angry?

Defiant children are always frustrated, irritated, angry, and searching for external blame.  They behave under the notion that they possess the same degree of wisdom and authority with parents or adults.  This assumption results to furious interaction with their friend, classmate, or anyone in authority such as troubled parents. 


When a mother or a father resorts to extreme scolding, defiant kids can influence the situation.  Children are able to turn the attention on the behavior of their parents.  Defiant children are branded as uncompromising, aggressive and explosive.  Generally, their parents are afraid to set some certain limits because chaos always follows.   Underlying problems about the defying behavior may come from emotional problems of children due to fights with parents, rejection of friends, traumas, and conflicts with siblings.  The child may demonstrate defiant behavior every now and then, and he may have an Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD).




In general, expert therapists discuss that parents must have thorough understanding about their child’s angry behavior.  The process is to bring every member of the family closely knitted to each other.  Often, nobody can confirm or guarantee the reasons behind the child’s bad behavior. The development of this behavior has something to do with how the child is being raised and disciplined.  The way family members react on the defiant child really matters.


 Members of the Family and the Defiant Children


It will be very hard for all the members of the family to truly understand the condition.  The child possessing a defiant character can generate many troubles for himself, siblings, parents, and to most people interacting with him.   Conversely, a hostile attitude will be a severe problem when displayed frequently every day.    Their behavior is obviously different when compared with other kids of similar age.  The developmental behaviors of defiant kids will potentially affect their academic learning, family, and social life.


It is very useful to have psychotherapy for the family.  This will develop good communication in assisting problem solving.  The approach decreases negativity.  Social skills will upsurge flexibility and will develop disappointment acceptance with peers.


Put end to your child’s defiant behavior.  Stop the bad, misleading behavior and see a child psychiatrist with many years of experience.  Controlling defiant children is actually teaching your kids to experience having more fun.  Parents should display less stress and troubles to control defiant children.


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How to Stop Child's Temper Tantrums in 4 Fastest Ways

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How to Stop Child's Temper Tantrums
What measures should parents do to stop child’s temper tantrums? Why do little children do these annoying and embarrassing tantrums?  Why can’t they wait, stop or behave well?

This is always the scene: You’re in a hurry and just about to pay your grocery items, then your child starts to ask for a chocolate bar. With your firm ‘No’ answer he still insists many times until he loses his tantrum. He cries out loud and starts to stomp his feet publicly and you can't stop him.  Confronted with temper tantrums is one of the most irksome scenarios commonly experienced by parents.

Just like children, adults also have moments of emotional outbursts once in a while.  Remember the time you’re totally maddened because your printer was down and you had to complete badly your task? You have thrown papers, screamed and acted with anger beyond control. Basically, we call it the “adult tantrum.” The great temper of the child in the grocery store is much like similar with the strong emotions you experienced—frustrations! Children become angry also; they are just like us. And it’s truly difficult to stop child’s temper tantrums directly. 
Temper tantrums basically are the children’s fastest ways of expressing any obstruction with the things happening around them. This is hard to accept, but kids still lack the self-discipline that breeds success.  They need self-control when dealing with different situations.  The best thing to understand as parents is to control and stop the child’s temper tantrums before they do this to us.

Key tips to help parents stop child’s temper tantrums

1.   Help the kid to have control over the situation. Parents sometimes can’t stop temper tantrum because the child simply wants a bit of “independence.”  Help them by offering some few choices in creating little decisions. Ask what they prefer to eat for breakfast: hotdog or fried egg, milk or chocolate.  Consider giving your kids at least 2 options in making his preference.

2.   Find immediate ways to divert their attention.  Common children have very limited attention spans. They swiftly change their concentration almost every minute. Take advantage of this opportunity to stop your child’s temper tantrums.  Show your kid his new toy or attractive book and gently talk to him. If you plan to go outdoors, bring pieces of stuff to distract his temper tantrums just in case he starts to scream.   

3.   Make it very quick.  Children by nature easily get bored and tired so they resort to temper tantrums.  No level of distraction can fight off tantrums once they lost control.  Be conscious enough about the warning signs your child is displaying like complaining, little crying, and reasoning.  They are red flags showing that something not good is about to happen.  So get some alerts from these signs to stop the coming bad behavior.

4.   Lack of love and attention.  Finally, remember that children always seek for your attention.  So you can stop child’s temper tantrums simply by giving quality time and care. Children are very smart; they know that unhelpful attention (like being reprimanded) is much better than not getting attention at all. Be generous in giving appreciation and rewards to your children.  Always plan to do things together every day, even for a few minutes.  Complete a puzzle with him, narrate a short story, work together, play with him, and so on. The reward is amazing—you could stop the child’s temper tantrums and he begins to behave positively.  He would try his best to stop his outburst of emotions.

Temper tantrums always come and go to children’s lives as well as to ours. Your responsibility as parents is to let them realize that bad behaviors are not suitable—in public and in homes.  Loving parents can help stop their child’s temper tantrums by making rules, setting limitations, and modelling for good behavior.

We hope the above tips can help you resolve and stop some of the recurring issues between you and your child. Understand that to totally stop a child’s temper tantrums is not easy, but you can make a place where both of you can effectively handle it together—successfully! 

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How to Stop Child's Temper Tantrums in 4 Fastest Ways  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips & Styles

Related topics to read on:
  1. Discipline Challenge on Bad Behaviors: Why Children Always Ignore their Parents
  2. Modern Children: Are They Hard to Discipline Now?
  3. Why Children Misbehave -- Bad Behaviors Require Parents’ Non-Reaction 

Self-Discipline -- Helping Children Develop Self-Control

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Self-discipline is a procedure of training and educating children to acquire an acceptable behavior in varying circumstances.  The process is done by depriving privileges and seldom by imposing punishment.  This is the most important factor parents must do to shape a child's character.  It is also acquired through different trainings and activities. Unfortunately, self-control is a great character most children don't possess.


Teaching children self-control or self-discipline is a skill to encourage oneself to practice despite unfavorable conditions.  Some qualities related to it are hard work, perseverance, and will power. 


Characteristics of Self-Discipline

1.   It is a work.  A great example of self-discipline is portrayed in this story.  Deafening applause spread out the concert hall.  A young renowned pianist has just perfectly rendered his last piece of music.  A man from the audience got up his way through the stage to congratulate the musician.  At last he grasped his hand and uttered, “I would give all my own life just to play like that.”  The young pianist answered ‘I have done it that way, Sir!’”

It takes diligence, control and hard work before anything in this world is achieved.  All things in life is about work. It is important that children understand this.  They can’t just ask their parents or anyone to do something for them.  


If you hear your son complaining that learning to play a guitar is too difficult to do, remind him that the more he exerts efforts the easier it becomes.  Long patience, resilience, determination and self-control are all related to practicing self-discipline.

Avoid doing all things for the child.  Let him work at what is needed to control his impulses.  Don’t immediately gratify the child by buying him a toy he wants.  Train him to work for it, save money and to buy one for himself.

2.   It is a matter of choice.  Parents can always help their children stop developing bad habits through self-control.  During the early age, train the child to choose right actions.  Hitting a sibling is a choice to do not because of what has happened.  It’s a virtue to teach a child that nobody can make him mad.  He only becomes angry because he chooses to be angry.  As your child keeps learning self-discipline and control, he’ll have the full understanding that he’s the one in charge of his entire life.  When he fully understands this, he’s giving himself empowerment to boost further his self-control, capabilities and choices in life.

3.   It goes with a prize.  Self-discipline gives various rewards.  Imagine a child who does control himself and work hard on his studies to get “A.” Or a sporty son who rehearses consistent batting and scores a home run.  And how about a child who does not give revenge or beat his sibling? Does he deserve an appreciation from the parents?  In the same extent, all these deeds call for self-control and self-discipline to bring in great rewards. 

Explain to children that most of the rewards and success they earn are generated by self-discipline and self-control.   On the other hand, tell your child that not getting good grades can’t be blamed on a teacher.  Or, a sport’s failure can’t be anyone else’s failure.  It is the child who is responsible for the consequences simply because he has not applied self-discipline.

Self-discipline helps children to develop self-control to suppress their outbursts; it is never relying on people to control them.  That’s why children have no reason to harm themselves as well as others—physically or verbally.  Bear in mind that it is a trait every parent should teach to a child.  Self-discipline is about building up self-control.  

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How and When to Use a Rod to Discipline a Child?

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What’s the meaning of using rod to discipline a child?  Is rod really an effective tool of correcting bad behaviors?  What’s the importance and role of a rod to parents and children?

Kids are naturally hungry to please their parents; however, they are not born with the acquired ability to do things right.  This is where a rod can help discipline a child; it plays the role of teaching and shaping a kid.  It also gives wisdom and makes a child sensible.  And parents who fail to do their obligation will also suffer the consequences of their children’s misbehavior.

A passage found in the Bible about rod is in Proverbs 13:24. In a Christian way of living a rod is used to discipline and correct the children’s bad attitudes.  If children don’t experience the consequences of their wrong doing, they won’t understand that bad behaviours need hurt to correct them.

The term “rod” designates a medium-sized, thin stick to bring a reasonable amount of pain without lasting injury.  A kid rationally deserves a rod to discipline him.  On the other hand, no child is worthy of bruises, cuts, or other forms of physical and verbal abuses.  It is also believed that using hands to spank the face is not appropriate.   A hand is designed to love children through touching, embracing and caressing.

Rod is one of the best ways to discipline a child.  Your children may not be afraid of your verbal reprimands, raised voice, punishment or other forms of discipline.  But the rod has a unique feature that moves every kid to respect and obey their parents.  If children see a rod they tend to correct their behavior rather than continue with it.  A rod has many lessons both parents and children can learn from.

Rod also protects a child from further injury.  The part of the body that needs to be beaten is his buttock.
This body part has thick, fleshly mounds that don’t hurt or break the bones.  Avoid beating the other parts like the hands, head, back, legs—these are painful and dangerous.  Buttock is the safest part to beat the child.

To “spare the rod” symbolizes a father or a mother who fails to discipline a child.  Unfortunately, these are the parents who hate their kids in a different perspective.  As wise advice to parents, don’t refuse to give it to discipline a child.  They won’t die with a rod.  It is for their own good to get punished by this stick.  Children who feel sorry about their mistakes and respect higher authority will realize they’re wrong and ask forgiveness.

Part of disciplining children is helping them become accountable for their actions.  Admittedly, children have the pride that blinds them from practicing what is good.  To use a rod does not necessarily mean that parents beat down children into forceful submission.  A rod is used to discipline and at the same time to care and value their children.  It is a parenting tool to become effective parents.

Bear in mind that parents should not over use their authority and power that can inflame the child to develop anger.  Avoid venting out to your kids about your frustrations.  If there’s defiance, use a rod to discipline a child’s bad behaviour but do it with love.

When the child is being disciplined it doesn’t make him happy.  Subsequently, there are rich rewards for discipline.  The value of the rod’s correction gives direction towards developing a winning character.  A kid who is trained on discipline has all the opportunities to go places and succeed in life. Start making a worthwhile goal.  Don’t a spare a rod to discipline a child; it gives them right destiny!!!

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How and When to Use a Rod to Discipline a Child?  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children


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Children’s Misbehavior: Understanding Punishments on Children

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Sickness and Symptoms
 
Children’s misbehavior is not a body sickness, but oftentimes placing punishments on children will cause physical and emotional scars. The cause of this sickness is by imposing punishment, rather than right discipline.  Most average families have experienced some early warning symptoms about this condition.  

While every abuse uses a form of punishment, not all is abusive.  This does not state that a slight punishment works or is okay.   Punishments are based on the conviction that kids should suffer in order to learn a few lessons.


Warning signs are most obvious in people who have power to control their kids—the parents.  Often, parents think that punishments on children will balance their parenting style.  Parents can use physical suffering although parents are not abusive.  The truth is punishments on children don’t teach well; they just hurt.  If parents impose suffering, it makes learning more difficult and builds resentment toward the anguishing kids.


Punishments on Children

All forms of punishment can result to emotional and physical damage on kids. The harm might not be noticeable, like physical bruises, but deep rooted emotional scars will last for a lifetime.  

Punishments on children may involve physical pain: spanking, beating, squeezing, dragging, pushing or kicking.  They can also involve scolding using hurtful verbal words.   Punishments use blame, warn, shame, or threat on kids.

Punishments on children usually last long and it’s very unfair to our kids to take them all. Often, parents use them whether they are related to a child's misbehavior or not.  When hurt and angry, parents always use punishments as tools to retaliate.

Punishment is a silent destroyer.  Often it does work and parents get a quick fix.  Instead of learning how to behave well, it makes kids feel afraid of what will happen if they misbehave.

Over time, punishments on children are no longer effective.  Many kids become immune to them.  They tend to misbehave when parents are not around.  Kids may not develop right discipline but the “I-don't-care” attitude.  Kids believe it is normal to do misbehavior as long as parents don't know it.  


The Cure

All abusive people have been maltreated by someone.  Mostly, punishments came from their parents.  Being abusive is a learned behavior.  Fortunately, not all abused kids grow up to be punishing parents. They make a better choice—to cure it.

The cure for harmful punishments involves all parents around the globe.  We need to re-learn the way we think as far as disciplining our children is concerned.  We need to replace harmful punishments on children with views that are healthy and positive.  Learn some effective parenting discipline skills.

When parents use punishments on children, they must be logically related to the act of misbehavior and not on the child.  Instead of making the child suffer, the focus is on fixing the mistake to prevent it from happening again in the future.  Parents should help children learn how to practice self-discipline and not blind obedience.



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Modern Parenting – 4 Tips on How to Balance Love and Discipline on Children

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Parenting is a huge obligation.  Most frequently, it is troubled with apprehensions.  It involves more on emotional aspects starting from fears to difficult anger management.  To balance love and discipline on children is a long-life process and very upsetting.   No matter what the situation, parents are supposed to turn big troubles and chaos into peaceful and loving atmospheres.  Unfortunately,  this technique is not learned in school.

No parenting styles prove to be more provoking, challenging and guilt-laden than to balance love and discipline on children.  If parents are too lenient, the child would simply run all over them. If parents are very strict, they can crash their child's spirit turning into fuming rebellion. There is only one key that helps:  a balanced management depending on the child’s personality.


What it takes to Balance Love and Discipline

1.   See it through the end.  Having virtues is not a default setting in our children.  It is an obligation of the parents to see this thing through.  What should well-adjusted adults look like, and how can they get there? Look for ways to encourage honesty, kindness, and integrity.  It is an involved, intimate process, and there are no shortcuts to balance love and discipline on children.

2.   Set specific ground rules.  Be steady in your reinforcement.  It is the parents’ job to draw the proverbial line in the sand and tell their children, "On this side of the line is disobedience, and on this side is obedience. Don’t cross the line." Write the rules down, if you must, and make certain that your child understands what constitutes disobedience. With younger children, rehearse the rules. Once you know that your children understand the house rules, as well as the consequences for breaking them, it is vital that parents be prepared to carry out the consequences—all the time.  This is to help balance love and discipline.

One mother says, "Our kids do understand that lying won’t be accepted. If they have done wrong and they lie to us, there is a double punishment. It only took a couple of times to test us.  Today, they recognize the high premium we put on honesty.  And I have applied ways to balance my love and discipline for my children.

3.   Make punishment suitable for the offense.There are more tools in a parent's disciplinary toolbox than scolding, yelling, and spankings.  Consequence is a teaching tool. If you forget that fact, you may miss out the teachable moments and opportunities for growth. Many annoyed parents have wondered if their son or daughter suffers from lack of common sense. Frequently, children inevitably do things that parents consider as offensive disobedience.  It is necessary to cherish the kids in an atmosphere that will balance love and discipline on young children. There is a big difference between childish irresponsibility and deliberate disobedience. Part of a parent's job is to tell the difference between the two.

4.   Show love then explain the punishment. In a child's mind, he makes mistake in taking frustration, anger, or disappointment of parents for loss of love.  It is for guidance, correction, and ultimately for his benefits.  Punishment is not just to make him sad. Explain the purpose why there is a punishment.  Let it be known that punishment is designed to balance love and discipline for your child. Embrace and kiss him later. If your support is a sweet thing, your child will treasure it often.

The key to balance love and discipline on children is to understand that both are inseparably related to each other.   As responsible parents, we train and discipline our children out of love.  Parents are like a gardener cultivating the blue ribbon roses.  It is never fun to trim thorny roses, but it is essential to enhance the plant to its full potential. 



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Children Hate their Parents: 5 Valid Reasons Why Children Dislike their Parents

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While there are many things parents don’t like about their kids, there are also valid reasons why children hate their parents.  It is illogical for parents who perceive that they are the only ones doing right and their kids are always the ones doing wrong.  Effective parenting is a two-sided relationship.  Both parents and children must work hand in hand in order to make their relationship grow.  There should be no opportunity to provoke and hate one another.

In this modern generation, one of the family issues is that kids don’t anymore respect their mothers and fathers--they hate them.  But how about us, are we aware that we should also respect and not hate our kids?  Often, parents complain about their children’s acts of stubbornness and disobedience.  Consequently, kids can hardly respect their parents and they tend to hate them instead.  Truth is many parents overlook their responsibility of nurturing their kids in caring ways.  They only see the authority they use to controlling them.  This sounds unfair for the kids, doesn't it?


Basis why Children may Hate Parents

1.    Over-protection does more harm than good.  Allow your child to discover new things on his own. Over-loving parents tend to over-protect their children in many ways--this can make kids to hate them.  Keep in mind that while a child continues to grow, he attempts to discover many things around him.   All kids have this natural inclination.  For younger boys, climbing up a small tree excites them.   You can provide useful tips on how to climb safely rather than restricting him.  So when the child climbs up again, he knows there are precautions to take. Children could hate a parent who is over-protective.  

2.    Unfulfilled promises.   There are situations that parents do promise things for their children.  The kids with all their efforts do their part.  When time comes, parents provide lots of excuses to break their promises.   If this happens, young kids may begin to hate them.  They won’t be convinced anymore that you can still keep your promise.  These unfulfilled promises are instilled in the child’s mind.  It is a hurtful experience when the people they trust can't keep their words.

3.    Frequent scolding is hateful.  You break their heart if you respond negatively while attempting to offer their help.  Kids want to please us in some small ways they can do, but how we ignore and hate their efforts.  Worse, they get unreasonably scolded rather than being appreciated and praised.  A husband and a wife are responsible to guide them into doing things right, not to verbally hate them when they create mistakes.  Be realistic that kids are too young to live by their parents’ standards.   Illogical anger is one thing kids hate about their parents. Parenting skills know how to discipline children without yelling and reprimanding.  

4.    Paying no attention.  There are times kids want to be proud of their own accomplishments.  They want their parents to get their approval and that they are achievers, too.  Never ignore your child’s great art work if he shows it.  It builds his self-worth and confidence if parents become happy for them.  On the contrary, children may hate their parents if you don’t always pay attention to their efforts.  They will have the impression that their works are not important to you.  Wouldn’t that be hateful for the little ones?

5.    Not doing what you teach.  Parents want their kids to be action doers but not for them.   This is one reason why children have the feelings of resentment.  They keep instructing their kids not to fight but aggressive blows are displayed by the father and mother.  Giving explanations is not helpful, showing your action does.   It is confusing for children not to fight if parents are quarrelsome and hate each other.  Kids view their parents as role models in every circumstance.

Although parents have the goals to go the other mile but it’s more likely for children to hate their parents for the above valid reasons.   So express your love by trying to avoid things they hate and  dislike.  For sure, you can win them back and earn their respect!



Children Hate their Parents: 5 Valid Reasons Why Children Dislike their Parents  is a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children 



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Why Parents Have Different Parenting Styles?

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Having effective parenting styles is very important in a family. This is the way in which a little child will be shaped and formed in his formative years. It extends to childhood, teenage up to maturity stage. Having a wrong parenting style will raise your child in a wrong way and it’s too hard to correct them once they’ve grown up.

Most of the problems arise only when parents themselves apply different parenting styles. What could be the major reasons? Answers may come from different factors: personality, culture, size of the family, location, background of parents, educational level, religion, and socioeconomic status.

 Within a family, different parenting styles would bring mess in the relationship. If a mother and a father quarrel, the pitiful losers are always the children. Without any intensions, parents feed their kids with much confusions and tensions.

Say for instance, the father may show an authoritative parenting style while the mother is in favor of the permissive style. A husband may be strict and the wife may be relaxed. One of them could be colder and the other very affectionate. What happens to the children? They get scolded and punished by either one of the parents. The mistake does not even come from the kids but from the parents.   


Different Parenting Styles – what parents can do   

1.   Agree with the right parenting style both of you should apply to the child. If you can’t agree well, then combine some of the factors applicable for a specific approach.

2.   Choose a parenting style that will promote great help and benefits to your kids. Your style should result to a joyful, confident, and successful life of your offspring.

3.   Parents must discuss it well and agree on certain rules. A father and a mother must support each other and avoid competing. Never have a dispute declaring that a wife’s parenting style is better than the husband’s.

4.    Although working together could be conflicting between parents, both should strive hard to attain the common goal of effective parenting. It is crucial not to challenge or demoralize the other partner.

5.   Avoid having arguments in front of the child should troubles arise. Keep this in mind: your agreed parenting style is a progressive stage. Discussing any concerns when the child is not around is more helpful.

6.   Explain to the child about the implementation. Children are very receptive to information and instructions that are easy to understand.

7.   Make it simple and educational. Explain that you’re doing this to help them grow into better individuals.

Different parenting styles and approaches are acquired on the parents’ past experiences. For successful results, it’s crucial that both parents should know how to cooperate with each other. Any varying factors that bring clouds should be dealt with. Parents are the first ones to harmonize with each other to come up with a viable parenting style. Improving your parenting style is a sure way to a happy, fulfilling family relationship.


Why Parents Have Different Parenting Styles?  is posted in Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children


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Why Children Misbehave -- Bad Behaviors Require Parents’ Non-Reaction

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Want to know, parents, the real secrets of having happy kids? And what to do when children misbehave? There are a couple of factors to consider and to deal with bad behaviors:  Love and Non-Reaction of parents.

This is how it goes when kids misbehave:  Expressing love alone is not enough to bring up a good and a happy child.  If love alone is the answer to resolve your kids' bad behaviors, then there would be no more disobedient, stubborn, and defying kids.  Kids misbehave because they lack information, lack some needs, and have some tensions.  


Aside from showing love, it is parents’ “NON-REACTION” that is required to cope with a child’s bad behaviors. One important parenting style to include is for parents to develop "Non-Reaction" response.  It is simple and yet many parents fall short of this category.  It simply means you ignore their bad behaviors when kids misbehave.  If you talk and react, the more bad behaviors kids are likely to display.


Non-reaction to Kid's Bad Behaviors

Webster's dictionary defines reaction as: "opposition or resistance to a force, influence, or action."  Another meaning which is more related to parents is an exhaustion or depressive condition because of exerting too much energy or stimulation. The second line is very familiar to most parents when confronted with bad behaviors, isn’t it?

Basically, a reaction is happening when two opposite forces have a collision. In the case of a family the two powerful forces are generally parents and kids.  If this happens, the outcome of bad behaviors is usually an  exhausted parent and a  miserable kid.


Kids as Winners, Parents as Losers

If you react to bad behaviors during the moments children misbehave, you as a parent are the loser.  No parents have ever won over their child’s bad behaviors.  It’s very ineffective to discipline them when they are angry, tensed, and misbehaving.

Rather than showing reactions, parents should keep calm and be aware of what's actually behind their kids' bad behaviors.  Let them realize no matter how much they cry, this action makes no sense to you.  This happens if you show non-reaction when they show off bad behaviors.


The Benefits

If this is so, then the struggling going on between you and your child is almost over.  Although children will misbehave again, it won’t and cannot bother you anymore.  Their sorts of bad behaviors have no effects to you.  Although kids misbehave, their bad behaviors are not big issues.  This simply means you win and the child loses.

After this scenario, and when the child has calm down,  put end to your struggle by carefully explaining to him why there’s no need for children to misbehave.  This is the best time for you to explain it.  Surely, the child will listen and understand your explanation.

In conclusion, when children misbehave and display bad behaviors, avoid giving reactions to their actions.   Talk to them when both of you have calmed down.  Ears and minds are at their ultimate functions to receive information when kids are not misbehaving or showing bad behaviors.

The next time children misbehave, parents should avoid showing reactions to it.  Parents can see that there are amazing results once bad behaviors are ignored!


Why Children Misbehave -- Bad Behaviors Require Parents’ Non-Reaction  is posted on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children


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      How TV Affects Your Children -- Tips on Parents about TV Programs

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      Today is the generation where media affects children and parents are incredibly caught by surprise.  Movies, TV programs, music, internet, mobile phones, other gadgets—all of which have invaded and influenced the lives of many people all over the world.   Kids in particular are the ones benefiting most from this.  A couple of questions to ask: How television affects children? Are the present TV programs good or bad for them?  What is the great impact of TV to children—from local to national to global type of TV programs?

      Issues related to TV programs 

      First.  Research studies do indicate that quarreling in TV programs can encourage critical physical behavior in young kids.  On TV programs, this is portrayed as acceptable behavior.  By watching these actions, television affects children; they become less sensitive to it in general.

      Second.  Kids see hundreds of TV commercials each week.  Few parents could or should buy all the products that commercials teach children to want.  This is one way how television affects the children.

      Third.  If television is set is on all the time, TV programs watching can easily become a habit that is hard to break.  Kids need a lot of leisure-time hours to explore on other activities rather than on TV programs alone.


      What should parents do?

      1.   What parents need to do is limit the amount of time children spend watching TV programs, to avoid them spending too many passive hours.  Don't let long hours on television affects your children.

      2.   They need also to monitor the quality of the TV programs.  A number of TV programs are filled with useful information and provide excellent opportunities for the kids, but others prompt undesirable thoughts and feelings in children.

      3.   Kids differ from each other in their reactions to the same show, depending on their particular sensitivities or reactions to what they’re watching.  This is also one major factor how TV affects the children.

      4.   Be alert to those TV programs that seem to prompt negative responses in your kids, such as excessive anxiety, sleeplessness, bad dreams, increased fears, or stronger behavior.

      5.   Tell them how television affects children and what will be the right programs to watch.  Consequently, they will understand why you are restricting their TV programs viewing.


      Make TV programs advantageous to Kids

      1.   Help them to be critical and evaluate the TV programs they do see.  This will increase their thinking skills and help them to be less gullible.  This way, television affects children positively.

      2.   Ask how they would feel if they were treated the way some of the characters are treated.  Tell them when you find something unbelievable on TV programs and seek their opinions.

      3.   Many serious problems are presented, explored, and resolved within the brief time block of TV programs.  Discuss how rarely this would happen in real life. Explain them how television affects children like them.

      4.   When your kids ask for products seen on TV programs or commercials, buy one and let them compare the difference between what the ads promise and what they actually deliver.  Commercial on television affects children.

      Parents should have active participation to know how television affects their children.  As responsible parents, you can make it an enriching experience for them.  With your guidance, your kids can become informed consumers. You can actually teach, train and discipline them by being selective in TV programs they’re watching!


      How TV Affects Your Children : Tips on Parents about TV Programs
      is a blog post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children




        Parenting : How to Train & Discipline Children in This Modern World

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        Children training and discipline is a parenting theme that has been angrily discussed in current years.   A great deal of this reason came from the term 'discipline.’ This displays a portrait of difficult and cruel punishment in the minds of most parents.  Undeniably, the dispute has made many parents of today to choose and accept a parenting approach that is “extremely permissive.”

        We all need training and discipline in our lives.  However, parents have to know what is good and bad behavior, and what things to do and not to do.  We also recognize that there are lots of things in life to do, even if we don't want to.

        What to Do in Training and Discipline

        1.   Truth is none of us is born with self discipline and training.  This is something our kids have to learn early and regularly.  As for the parents, appropriate training and discipline must be something they should know first in order to teach their children.

        2.   One lesson parents have to find out is that training and disciplining kids is done individually. Remember also that one parenting style that works for a child does not essentially become suitable with another child.

        3.   Parenting styles should help to realize that training and discipline requires a link to a child's degree of understanding. In most part, this is a role of age.  But remember each child develops at different rates.   So it’s crucial that kids' needs are to be taken into consideration.

        4.   Any response to bad behavior has to be fitting to the age of children.  Response given in training and discipline should be effective for the individual child. Understand why there is a misbehavior--mostly, kids are in need of missing attention that's why they do it.

        5.   Children training and discipline is not all the time acceptable if it only highlights punishments.  For kids this isn’t going to work.  Teaching them a lesson will always go a long way; imposing punishment will scare them.  However the training and discipline lesson parents are teaching them is not well understood. 

        6.   If a parent is angry while training and disciplining the child, the kid comprehends not the lesson but the anger.  It's the anger which is very exhausting but not helpful that instilled in the mind of a child.


        Applying Logical Consequences

        Alternatively, the use of “logical consequences”--proven to be an effective form of training and discipline--won’t require lots of emotional energy on parents. This makes sense to children, too.  Our kids don't need punishment but unconditional love. What punishment, in any form, cannot do to the kids, love will always do.  Try to link discipline and training to a logical or natural flow.  Thus, it enables parents to choose the most suitable type of children training and discipline.  

        Learn this, parents: Our kids are given to us for protection and love.  Along this is the parenting responsibility to raise them the right way.  It 's our role to figure out the best parenting approach to apply.  It starts with loving them unconditionally. The training and discipline you give should always involve in loving and not hurting. No matter what, they deserve to be loved and respected like adults. This is what parents are called for.


        Parenting : How to Train and Discipline Children in this Modern World  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children


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