Ways to Help Your Child not to Use Excuses

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As a parent, I understand how hard it is to train and discipline children because I can see it in my own son.   No matter what goes wrong in him, he doesn’t always run out of good excuses.  What he normally does is to put the blame on something or someone else for all faults.  Constantly, my son is on the go, so the only opportunity to discuss with him about issues is just before he sleeps at night.  However, our conversations have never turned out the way I’d wanted it.   He puts an end to our discussion upset and crying with me.  He yells because he believes I blame him for things he never did.  Can you please help me find ways to train and discipline my child.

Physical exhaustion does affect human awareness and, as a result, it affects communication.   After a long day of work and play, the not-so-hard problems may seem to be undefeatable.  When parents are tired and weary, beginning to train and discipline their children are hard.  Parents are inclined to be more emotional  rather than rational.   Here’s what you can do with your child's excuses:

1.   Talk with each other when both of you have relaxed and rested.   Probably over a breakfast before he becomes occupied with the activities of the day.  You explain yourself as frequently engaging your son in serious talks when he is physically tired.  If you want to train and discipline your child that way it might be ineffective.  Most likely you as a parent can have the tears, pressures, and resentment avoided by delaying some important topics until next day.  A sound, good sleep at night goes a long way in getting rid of emotional disagreements and excuses.
2.   You are right that your son should take the responsibilities for his own actions and behavior, it’s an effective approach to train and discipline children that way.  Your method of dealing with him helps find out his failure or success.   When your son is questioned in a way you seem to be accusing him, it is less likely that he will accept his faults and wrongdoings.  If a child fears unkind punishment or the anger of his parents, to offer excuses is the safest way to do.  Worse, when he has developed it as a habit (putting blame on someone or something else) he will start believing made-up stories in the long run.  As a loving parent begin to train and discipline your child while he is still young.

3.   If you’ve recognized that your son is the one responsible for causing a problem, ask him about it in a non-penalizing, non-threatening manner.  Let him feel how much you want to help him understand his problems.  Parents don’t realize that to train and discipline children that way are so effective.   Sooner or later, this ability will be far more functional than his fabricated excuses. 

As a parent, you can help your son feel he’s truly able to solve problems.  If you show love rather than reprimand, you are helping him overcome his excuses and develop a winning character.   And when he’s grown up, he could train and discipline his children the way you did to him.

Ways to Help Your Child not to Use Excuses  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children

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Overweight Kids: Controlling Overeating to Avoid Being Obese

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My son is an overweight kid, a problem I never expected to happen to him.  My other two children are just fine in their weight, and I can keep their favorite food around the house just for the two kids.  The trouble comes when my obese son sees the food he goes on overeating everything he can see around.  I feel totally disturbed and I really don’t know how to deal with it.
You did not point out visiting your regular doctor to realize if your son really should be classified as “obese.”  Because you have always feared having an overweight kid, you might be mistaking a case of being a little overweight with one of obesity.  In any case, this is not easy for you, and you wish you could do something about it.

Obesity or overweight is a severe difficulty for children and for those parents who care about them.  Large children quickly discover that adults normally are sorry for them but that peers exclude them.  Being obese can obstruct a child’s capability to join effectively in a lot of activities.  The most important question is that obesity is disadvantageous to the child’s health and personality.  Some factors can be considered to control overeating:

1.   Ask your other children to purposely help you.  Tell them that you are going to buy only healthful food for snacks, and that you trust they will not complain but understand it’s really better for their bodies, too.  Prepare very good but low-calorie meals.

2.   Avoid nagging or showing disgust toward your son.  Rather, let him know how much you care about him no matter what his weight is.

3.   Try to find out a guide in his eating binges; they might happen, for instance, when he feels fed up or disappointed about his school experiences.

4.   If you can get him occupied in an activity, the problem might resolve itself.  This action could be a pastime (making models, taking care of a pet, collecting stamps—it really doesn’t matter what, as long as it makes him interested) or a neighborhood work (car washing, cutting of grass, etc.).  

       5.   And, most importantly, give an overweight kid the attention on matters not related to his predicament.

Being obese and indulging in overeating are within a person’s control.  It helps if you can apply these tips and find out how well they can work for your child!

Overweight Kids: Controlling Over-eating to Avoid Being Obese is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children

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