Technology: Helping Video Game Addicts Overcome Their Addiction

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Video game addicts.
While your children may not seem to be one of the video game addicts, majority of psychologists state that there are some family concerns on the overpowering obsessions children experience when playing video games. 

If your children show proofs as video game addicts, try to follow the suggested corrective measures below.  See how their behavior changes.  If improvement doesn’t happen, then it’s time to confront your children about the issue.  Try outside help by consulting with their teachers, peers, or neighbors.


Here are some of the symptoms of the video game addicts.  Specialists recommend the need of parents’ interventions on the following warning signs:

Video game addicts show difficulties in academic subjects:

1.   Minimized attention span.
2.   Listening skills become poor.
3.   Grades continue to decline.
4.   Unable to concentrate on doing tasks.
5.   Can’t complete assignments or projects.
6.   Can’t think logically.
7.   Can’t follow instructions.
8.   Troubles in understanding information.

Video game addicts show difficulties in the physical aspect:

1.   Eyes get dry and strained.
2.   Headaches.
3.   Dryness of the skin face.
4.   Feeling nervous.
5.   Difficulty in sleeping.
6.   Walking while sleeping, nightmares.
7.   Wrist swelling with pain and numbness.

Video game addicts show some psychological difficulties:

1.   Anti social behavior.
2.   Raised aggressiveness in behavior.
3.  Often feeling frustrated.
4.  Manipulate others (complaining, throwing tantrums).
5.  Withdrawing self from others.
6.  Can’t socialize well.
7.  Always rushing when eating, bathing, or working.
8.  No time to participate on activities formerly enjoyed.

What should parents do to help video game addicts conquer their addiction?

1.   Recognize that all video games are nothing but just “games.” They’re not  very important and they can go away even without any giving extreme effects to children.

2.   Put limitations on the time for kids to play on videos. One to two hours are good enough to satisfy one’s craving for games.

3.   Keep children busy to do other important things like reading, cleaning, joining sports, doing other hobbies and a whole lot more.

4.  Suggest to kids to have connections with their other friends. Video game addicts normally use the player in isolation. Help kids bring back life with peers. Hanging out with real people brings back the real world for them.

Video game addicts are they who have serious problems on playing video games.  The answer is very simple that requires little power compared to completely breaking dependency on certain drugs. Aside from video games, there are more exciting and deeper games to play on instead—the real life games.  So encourage children to start joining and playing the real games now!

Fears: Developmental Fears Children Face (based on certain age)

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Developmental Fears Children Face
Fears can be found from kids of different ages. There are different fears children face in different stages, a reality that happens typically to every child.  Each fear is specific, based on a certain age. 


The following are some of the most common developmental fears children face.  If your child exhibits them, take him seriously, but don’t give him excessive attention.  

The first year: Fear of strangers and separation from parents are primary fears.  Other fears involve sudden loud noise, falling, animals, sleep and doctor.

The one-year-old:  Many of the fears of the first year continue.  Others that develop are fear of the dark, thunder and lightning, toilet training, and the bath.

The three-year-old:  Fears of new situations, the dark, dogs, scary noises, separation from parents may continue.  New fears revolve around the child’s developing imagination.  Fear of monster is very common.

The four-year-old:  New fears involve bad thoughts and loss of control such as bed-wetting.  Primary is the fear of losing a parent.

The five-year-old:  Many of the earlier fears persist, but they are based more in reality than previously.  Losing mother or the caretaker parent remains the primary fear.

The six-year-old:  Fears are more intense and specialized (big dogs).  Fears of monsters, ghosts, wild animals, sleeping or staying alone, water and separation from parents are common.  The six-year-old is also afraid of bodily injury and will often exaggerate minor injuries.

The seven-year-old:  Normal fears include supernatural beings, the dark, the things seen on TV or in a movie, shadows, heights, spies, burglars, adoption, being late in school, new situations, and social rejections.

The eight-year-old:  Many of the fears of the year before continue, but the 8-year-old is more likely to worry about the situation, often making himself face his fear as a means of resolving it.

The nine- to twelve-year-old:  Most fears revolve around realistic situations such as tests in school, crime in the neighborhood, being left alone, natural hazards, bodily injury to self or loved ones, physical appearance, and social popularity.

The teen years:  Typical fears include snakes, heights, the dark, deep water, getting lost in the woods, and being alone.  Primary fears concern social performance sexuality.

As your child matures, use good stories and people’s experiences to teach him to face his fears. There is nothing your child should fear about, eventually he will outgrow his struggles and overcome them. As responsible parents, do something to get rid of the fears your children face.


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Child Abuse: Understanding Types of Child Abuse and How to Avoid Them

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Child abuse is failing or doing something that could result to injury or harm to a child.

An abuser is someone who fails to take care of a child, bodily injures the child, or communicates sexually with the child.
What are the types of child abuse?

  • Emotional 
  • Physical 
  • Neglect
  • Sexual 
Emotional child abuse:
Emotional abuse is the most harmful type of child abuse. Emotional abuse is an action, behavior or failure to do something that upsets the child’s social development or mental health.
This type can come from a verbally simple insult to a severe type of punishment.  This is found together with the other forms of child abuse.
Emotional abuse stays for a longer time.  It has more psychiatric negative effects than sexual or physical abuse. As a result, emotional abuse is practically the same as verbal abuse, mental abuse, or psychological abuse.
Instances for emotional abuse always include fault finding, humiliation, labeling, branding, showing disrespect, or any action that hurts the self-esteem of the child.

Physical child abuse is an act that results to injury done through physical violence. Some bases acts of injury include hitting, burning, pushing, punching, shaking, cigarettes burning, kicking, scalding water, beating or other form of physical hurting.  Some signs showing physical abuse include repetitive injuries, bruises, burns, head injuries, illness, frequent crying, fatigue, bite marks and fear of people.

Neglect:
Neglect is also a common form of child abuse. Most children of today experience more neglect than sexual or physical abuse. Symptoms of neglect are failure to provide the child’s basic needs, physical hunger, and clothes not appropriate to weather.

There are 3 forms of neglect: physical, emotional, and educational neglect.
  • Educational neglect is the inability to supply necessary schooling.
  • Physical neglect is the inability of parents to provide food, clothing, and proper health care.
  • Emotional neglect is the inability to provide unconditional love, emotional needs and psychological care.
Sexual child abuse:
Sexual child abuse is a traumatic experience of children. It involves physical acts between the child and the adult.  Warning signs of sexual abuse include difficulty in sitting or walking, genital pain, extreme hostility, seductiveness, troubles in sleeping or eating, frequent crying, feeling lonely, avoiding interactions with others.

How to prevent child abuse?
  • Discipline the child but do not spank. Avoid disciplining if you are anger or out of control.
  • Guard your child against sexual matters on the net.
  • Be warned when someone displays greater interest in the child.
  • Adults, parents must be caring and loving towards their children.
  • Establishing preventive services such as activities on public education, programs on family support, and seminars on parental education.
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Warning Symptoms and Physical Signs of Sexual Abuse or Incest


Warning Symptoms and Physical Signs of Sexual Abuse or Incest

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Seek for immediate medical treatment if you observe any of the following warning symptoms and physical signs of physical abuse or incest on your child.  Discuss with the physician, share the problems with them. Get a report from the doctor should there be physical evidence of incest or sexual abuse.

Incest physical warning signs could demonstrate the following:
   1.   Rectal pain, discharge, swelling, itching, and bleeding.
   2.   Vaginal pain.
   3.   Difficulty in swallowing, urinating or bowel movements.

   4.   Headaches or stomach pains.
   5.   Infections of the body’s private parts.
   6.   Cannot sit or walk comfortably.
   7.   Recurring attempts to leave the house.
   8.   Promiscuity and / or prostitution.

Behavioral signs accompanied by sexual abuse or incest include:
   1.   Irregular eating like biting, hair pulling or cutting.
   2.   Severe behavioral changes and disorders.
   3.   Lacking self-worth accompanied with poor human interactions.
   4.   Childish attitude like bedwetting, screaming, or thumb sucking.
   5.   Fear of night or dark, sleeplessness, or repetitive nightmares.
   6.   Extremely frightened by a specific person.
   7.   Uncommon knowledge about sexual matters.
   8.   Grades continue to get low.
   9.   Telling lies most of the time.
  10.  Displaying signs of depression.

It’s so significant to remember that these signs of sexual abuse or incest can also be common problems.  Some of these symptoms could be the cause of traumatic experiences and not essentially incest. Neither could they be warning signs of sickness like depression.  Others remain red flag signs of sexual abuse or incest in the family.

The above signs must get the attention of the concerned parent.  What should a parent do to help the child?

   1.   An initial effective move is to talk to the child. 
   2.   Give the child more time to talk and interact with you.
   3.   Be more interested; always ask further questions.
   4.   Let the child feel your genuine support and love.
   5.   Make her feel you’re there to make her strong, confident, and happy.
   6.   No matter what happens, assure your continual love.
   7.   Increase your discussion with peers, counselors and teachers.
   8.   Figure out the child’s activities, friends, and people she spends time with.

If you feel there is an on-going incest or physical sexual abuse in your home, you suspect a certain individual as the perpetrator.  Contact one of the crisis or child abuse centers in your local area.  Give your concerns to an advocate.  Their advice on sexual abuse or incest could be effective and helpful.

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Tired Mother: How to Enhance Creativity to Children

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How to enhance creativity to children?

 "Just before I became a parent I had a dream of helping my children become creative contributors to society;  however, the reality of daily living leaves me exhausted and makes me a tired parent.  After the whole day’s tasks, I feel I am hardly in the right mood to motivate the creativity of my son."


Being a parent and the parenting process itself are very challenging.  Substantial effort is spent by most parents in order to get through the day fruitfully successful.  A parenting life demands great efforts and enlarged responsibilities for yourself, your children and the entire family.   Unfortunately, many parents think that careers, major projects, outings, or money are required to encourage their children’s creativity.  Sometimes these things do help, but not the real grounds to enhance creativity to children.


The important day-to-day routine of family members will supply large opportunities for promoting their creativity.  Say for instance, every one of you might plan eating dinner or brushing your teeth with your non-dominant hand.  It isn’t helpful to do it for your convenience, but the opportunity to think of ways to use your other hand in order to practice doing something better leaves many challenges to all. Bathing by candlelight and having a picnic meal on your floor in the living room are but some situations of changes in tediously boring routines.  You may encourage your child to think of other applicable ideas.  Mentally, it’s another way of showing how creative they are by asking them what they can suggest.  You will be amazed how children of this present generation can start creating things in their minds that will show in their actions later.

You will wonder how over the way such independent changes will persuade conversation and flicker eagerness.  They might as well contribute to your vision of fostering your son’s creativity.  As a concerned parent help your children develop their minds and bring out their best ability.   Teach them creativity by showing ways on how to be creative to yourself first.  Being a tired parent, it is empowering to see your son showing his excellent skills.

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Family Meetings: Resolving Family Issues and Conflicts through Family Meetings

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Because there is continual interaction between family members, the complexity of living may seem overwhelming, but a constructive approach of resolving family issues and conflicts is always possible.  Good communication between all members is essential, especially during periods of stress and anger.  No families are completely free of problems.  Even those who seem ideally happy encounter inevitable problems that must be solved.
  
Although being an effective parent is sometimes hard, we must remember to celebrate the existence of our children and ourselves.  As we explore new ways to help our children feel good about themselves, we are fulfilling a primary goal of parents.  One of the most rewarding jobs in life is raising decent, healthy, and ultimately useful human beings.

A good place to resolving family issues and conflicts is through family meetings.  They are a good place to work on the problems and needs through discussions. 

Obviously, parents set the atmosphere that determines whether meetings will be successful or not in dealing with issues and conflicts. Parents can make their children feel that family meetings are a safe place to share thoughts and feelings without dominating the discussion. 


Consider the following when having family meetings:

1.     Family meetings should not be scheduled more frequently than once a week.

2.     Everyone of the family should look forward to them rather than dread the issues and conflicts.

3.     Plan them for times when no one is likely to be hungry or tired.  Parents sometimes make the mistake of using these sessions solely to air complaints about their children—a sure way to make the children resist attending.

4.     Family meetings should provide time both to reflect on positive aspects of  life and not to mention purely on issues and conflicts.

5.     Planning positive statements about each person can be helpful.  Everyone likes to hear that good behavior does not go unnoticed, and everyone likes to receive a compliment.

6.     In resolving family issues and conflicts, discuss only essential problems and ignore the insignificant family issues.

7.     During family meetings, every member should be encouraged to be a good listener as well as to make constructive contributions.  Even 4 and 5 year-olds can learn to participate in resolving conflicts and issues.

8.     Working together allows family members to see that there is more than one way to solve any particular problem.  If one solution does not work, then everyone involved can help choose another.

9.     Sometimes we take ourselves and each other too seriously.  We must remember to have fun together.  Smiles and laughter can brighten our spirits and reduce tensions.

10.     A sense of humor can help family meetings put things into perspective and lighten emotional load.  During sorrowful times of resolving family issues and conflicts, our families comfort us and we celebrate each other’s victories and accomplishments.

Family can eliminate unwanted habits or change objectionable behavior patterns.  Family meetings teach children to make informed decisions and how to evaluate them.  Children also learn that conflicts can be resolved constructively. Even at the most stressful times, a hug from someone we love can bring a big help.  Affection between members can make it easier to cope with the problems of daily living and family meetings are the best tools in resolving family issues and conflicts.

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A Spoiled Child: 10 Signs That Your Child is Spoiled

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Signs your child is spoiled.
What are the signs to know that your child is spoiled?  Spoil me rotten! Many parents will say that they don’t spoil their child with unending amounts of hugging, rocking, holding, or cooing.  Over-indulgence can make a child spoiled especially when she has passed already her toddler years.  It is so simple to get the spoiled child on the playground and yet it’s much difficult to use a critical eye for us the parents.


Here are the top 10 signs of a spoiled child:

1.   Often, she’s throwing tantrums.  Whether at home or in public, a spoiled child frequently throws many tantrums, and would not care about the people watching around her.


2.   She always feels dissatisfied.  Generally, a spoiled child cannot express complete satisfaction with what she has.  If she sees a toy or something, she will still want to get it.

3.   A spoiled child is lazy to help and work.  Child normally doesn’t like to help in cleaning up or doing household chores.  But the moment a child has passed her toddler stage, she must be willing to help in the family like doing small tasks, and organizing or cleaning her own stuff.  

4.   She always wants to control her parents and other adults.  A spoiled child oftentimes will not delineate between her parents and peers.  She will always expect both of them to listen to her.

5.   Most of the times a spoiled child will make you feel angry and embarrassed in public.  There is always a mistake here and there.  If in case a child expressly embarrasses her mother or father in public just to look for attention, you better go to an isolated place.

6.   She doesn’t like to share.  Small toddlers find it hard to master the art of sharing and giving. However, if she reaches her 4th age, she must already be willing to share her stuff like toys and food, with other members of the family.  

7.   A spoiled child wants you to beg her.  A person in authority like the parents or caretaker should be followed by a child when giving a request to her.  There is no need for you to beg her to make the task done.

8.   She ignores you most of the time. A child does not want hearing a word like “no” but she’s not supposed to pay no attention to you when you’re talking to her.  She must learn to listen and do what you say.

9.   She cannot play by herself; she doesn’t want to play alone.  At the age of 4, a child must then be able to play and be willing to play on her own.  It demonstrates that she’s still in need of attention if she calls her parents and playmates to play with her.

10.  A spoiled child wants bribing. Parents are not supposed to bribe their children in doing their assignments or when performing some tasks.  Avoid bribing with toys, money, or treats just to get her finish what she’s doing.

Probably, the simplest thing parents can do to is to have a spoiled child, and it is more difficult if we learn to keep the child punished.  So put some limits to yourself to make things a lot easier.  Limitations will set boundaries to your kid’s every need and demand.  Allow yourself as parents to agree some limits with your children, and you’ll be amazed how these 10 signs that your child is spoiled will ultimately be over.

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How to Raise Good Kids: Be Realistic, Kids Mess Up

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Kids are not perfect. How to raise good kids is not expecting perfection. They mess up most of the time.  They are kids, especially when it comes to grades.  Good grades are not worth crying over.  Good grades are not worth sacrificing social balance over.  Ask your kids to do their best then teach them to be satisfied with their results.



LIST ON HOW TO RAISE GOOD KIDS:

     1.    If you have little bitty kids, sit on the floor a lot.  Communicate at their level.
     2.    Teach them about money.  How to earn it, save it, invest it, spend it, and give it away.
     3.    Raise good kids by listening to them.  Ask more, tell less.
     4.    Hug more—this is what they need—then nag less.
     5.    Show your kids good affection even after they think they are too big for it.
     6.    Teach them good, important things: kindness, charity, love, forgiveness, compassion, respect, honesty, responsibility, and how to have fun.
     7.    Never lie to them if you want to raise good kids.  Never tolerate any lie from them.
     8.    Raise good kids by developing their own uniqueness.  Do not try to mold their personality. 
     9.    Let them be who they are and let them become what they want to be, not what you want them to be.
   10.  Do not make jackass out of yourself at their sporting events.
   11.  Raise them up but do not protect them too much.  Let them make their own mistakes and suffer the consequences.  The lesson is in the consequences.
   12.  Give more love than stuff and you’ll raise good kids.


STAY INVOLVED TO RAISE GOOD KIDS

Know what is going on in your kids’ lives.  Know what their good interests are.  Know their friends.  Have their friends over to your house for a party.  Yes, they will trash your house, but it is better to have a messed up house than a dead kid.  We raise children but they die these days.  There are guns and drugs and suicide and pedophiles to deal with.  We do not have too many of those things to deal with when we were younger.  Kids today deal with more serious stuff than we ever did.  The best way how to raise good kids is to keep your kids involved and you being involved with them.  Know who they hang around with, know where they go and have their friends come to your house so you can be close—not to meddle in their business, but just so you will be there if needed.


GIVE THEM THEIR PRIVACY, BUT KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON

Do not read their email or their diaries.  Do not be a snoop.  You need to stay informed but if you violate their privacy they will resent you and cut you off from any and all information.  If you really want to raise good kids know what is going on, establish a relationship based on open communication, trust, and respect.  Then you will not have to resort to being a snoop in order to stay informed.


BE COOL BUT NOT TOO COOL

Be the good, kind of parent your kids can talk to.  But do not be their best friend.  Do not try to be one of the gangs.  I raise good kids with my two boys.  I am their friend but I am still their father.  We can openly talk about anything in the world.  Yet, there is a line between being their best friend and still being their father that we do not cross.

It is sad to see mothers and fathers trying to be their kids’ good friends.  Children should pick their own friends.  Let them.  Do not be such a needy parent that you require your children to pick you as their best friend.  Be realistic on how to raise good kids!

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Raising Your Child: 3 Secrets to Raising a Happy Child

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There are really no secrets to raising a happy child.  Parents need only to do one simple thing: to stop doing all things that keep the child pleased in the short-term.  Giving everything your child wants make him think everything can be attained in this world which is not the way it is. 

Understand that raising a happy child is not absolutely the parents’ responsibility.  Many parents who think they are responsible for their children’s happiness will only cause anger, loneliness and failures to themselves and the kids.  Most parents tend to immediately provide things to resolve their kids’ emotional problems.  Unluckily, if children do not learn how to deal with their negative emotions, parents may not be able to create happy children.  Many conditions will increase problems to their children’s lives.


Once parents realize they can’t really make their kids happy, children will be likely to fix their own feelings. Through this, parents can help children to develop resilience, skills for coping up with obstacles and solutions to many struggles.



Here are the three secrets to raising a happy child


Secret # 1:  Always nurture strong connections.


Your kids’ way of enhancing his long-life healthy emotions is by being “connected” with people.  It means they are connected with the members of the family, relatives, friends, not excluding house pets.  Genuine happiness comes from being a part of other people’s lives.  A happy feeling that somebody understands, appreciates and cares about them is the largest defender against emotional and mental disturbances.  The condition helps also in coping with the risky behaviours in alcohol, sex, smoking and taking drugs. 

Secret #2:  Allow opportunities for achieving success and overcoming failures.


If you truly want to strengthen the self-confidence of your child, avoid focusing much on praises but provide more ways in honing his skills and learning new things.  It is mastery that builds higher self-esteem and not compliments. Our greatest challenge to raising a happy child is to stay back and allow our kids do things they can do for themselves.  Allow children learn things through the consequences of their wrong choices and actions. One big mistake parents unconsciously do is caring and doing too much for their young children, depriving them the opportunities to succeed and excel.


In reality, it is not easy for parents to see children struggling hard.  But eventually they’ll get the mastery in what they do if they are allowed to do things for themselves.  On their first attempt, only few skills are completed, but through patience and practice, kids will accomplish expertise. Through recurring mastery experiences will they mature and carry the “I can do” attitude. These secrets to raising a happy child will allow passion and optimism overcome future struggles.

Secret #3:  Don’t forsake responsibilities.


Children become happy mainly because of the feeling that they can do things especially when they receive importance from others.  Deprived of that feeling, they become afraid and feel left out by others.  Studies show that what children are afraid of is the state of being excluded.

In short, every person has the inborn need to be appreciated, loved and needed to be happy.  The more you affirm about your kids’ great contribution to the family, the larger they develop confidence and you can succeed in raising a happy child.  Children three years old or below can contribute significant role to the family.   


So if your child loves to organize things, offer him a task to sort CDs. If he is predominantly nurturing, provide opportunities to look after his baby sister while eating your meal.  As long as your child is making a great contribution, it will raise his sense of confidence and connection.


What makes raising a happy child successful could surprise you! Experts say that child’s happiness is something parents can’t give like a gift.  In fact, over-protected and over showered with toys, children are more prone to grow fed up, pessimistic, and lacking confidence.  The most important secret to raising a happy child is not external but internal:  helping kids to develop inner tools children can count on for the rest of their life.

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Raising Your Chid: 3 Secrets to Raising a Happy Child is a blog post on  ModernParenting Tips&Styles for Children