Fighting Children: How to Handle Sibling Rivalry

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Although there are more chances for siblings to become good friends, it is normal to experience sibling rivalry and understand how to deal with fighting children at home.  More often, a rivalry begins when another child is about to come.  The conflict may grow deeper.  They will start looking for things like toys, dress, food, and even parents’ attention.  As they continue to grow, their needs will have impact on how they deal with each other, and then fighting begins.

It is annoying to see fighting children most of the time. It is upsetting to live in a home that’s noisy and full of anxiety.  It is even harder to stop their sibling rivalry going on.  But it’s not bad at all because parents can have guideposts to work for peace between the two siblings.

There are a number of reasons why sibling rivalry and fighting never leave your home.  There’s a degree of strong competition and jealousy that causes arguments and backbiting.  But more factors can further create siblings rivalry that worsen the condition.  They may include the following: 

1. Needs for growing up. It is but common for fighting children to experience anxieties and varying needs that have direct influence to their lives.  For instance, toddlers shield their toys with exaggeration.  They are assertive most of the time.  When a baby grabs that toy, the toddler becomes forceful.  From there comes a sibling rivalry.

School-age children possess the concept of equality and fairness.They may wonder why their younger siblings get better attention.  Teens, on the contrary, have developed independence and individualism.  They dislike helping in household chores like caring for younger siblings.  These differences will strongly influence sibling rivalry.

2.  Unique Personalities. Fighting children take place when there’s individual temperament. Things like moods, flexibility, and character play roles that directly relate to a sibling rivalry.   For instance, if one of the children gets easily upset while the other one is relaxed, both may have sibling rivalry.  In the same manner, a child who lacks comfort, love, and support from parents would have hard feelings on his sibling who freely receives good treatment.

3.  Illness of sibling.  At times, there are some special needs that require more time and attention of parents like when a child is sick. Kids always feel jealous when parents do this since they don’t fully understand the reason why.  They may complain and feel envious.

4.  Fighting Parents. How children see their parents deal with conflicts is likely to be imitated by them.  If the husband and wife resolve a conflict with respect, and not being hostile, fighting children will embrace your technique of facing problems. On the other hand, if parents habitually slam the door, noisily debate, and disrespect each other, the same bad behavior will be replicated by the fighting children.

What to do when sibling rivalry fight begins

Obviously, it is not comfortable for all members of the family when sibling rivalry occurs.  There is always a tolerable level for the fighting children.  When the match begins, what should parents do? The following are highly recommended:

1.   Separate the struggling kids and wait till they have both calmed down. When things get worse, the best thing to do is give space to the siblings.  If not, the fighting becomes heightened.  Wait till anger and resentment have disappeared.  Then it’s time to talk about the sibling rivalry when both are not fuming.

2.   As much as possible, avoid joining the quarrel.  If you keep getting involved, you’re making it worse. You may intervene only if you think there’s physical injury going on. There is a tendency that you will favour one and dislike the other and a bigger problem may arise--more fighting in home.

3.   Parents may coach the fighting children using gentle words of advice. This is not the same with intervening.  They can be encouraged to resolve the issues themselves.  If you think there’s a need to step in, address the conflicts with both siblings.

4.   Avoid highlighting the sibling rivalry by pointing out who is at fault.  Don’t blame either one of them.  There’s a fight for two siblings, and if you join the fight you are relatively accountable.

5.   Prepare a win-win position for the fighting children to achieve something.  For instance, when a favourite toy is the source of the fight, probably an interesting game could be set up by you.  Both could enjoy and play together.

Always remember that sibling rivalry happens to receive the attention of their parents.  In this situation, why not take a time-out option for yourself. Fighting children may disappear when a parent leaves at the moment.  And if your patience reaches the limits, consider handing your children over to a third party—a relative or a friend probably. There is always a solution for fighting children.

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Self-Discipline -- Helping Children Develop Self-Control

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Self-discipline is a procedure of training and educating children to acquire an acceptable behavior in varying circumstances.  The process is done by depriving privileges and seldom by imposing punishment.  This is the most important factor parents must do to shape a child's character.  It is also acquired through different trainings and activities. Unfortunately, self-control is a great character most children don't possess.

Teaching children self-control or self-discipline is a skill to encourage oneself to practice despite unfavorable conditions.  Some qualities related to it are hard work, perseverance, and will power. 

Characteristics of Self-Discipline

1.   It is a work.  A great example of self-discipline is portrayed in this story.  Deafening applause spread out the concert hall.  A young renowned pianist has just perfectly rendered his last piece of music.  A man from the audience got up his way through the stage to congratulate the musician.  At last he grasped his hand and uttered, “I would give all my own life just to play like that.”  The young pianist answered ‘I have done it that way, Sir!’”

It takes diligence, control and hard work before anything in this world is achieved.  All things in life is about work. It is important that children understand this.  They can’t just ask their parents or anyone to do something for them.  

If you hear your son complaining that learning to play a guitar is too difficult to do, remind him that the more he exerts efforts the easier it becomes.  Long patience, resilience, determination and self-control are all related to practicing self-discipline.

Avoid doing all things for the child.  Let him work at what is needed to control his impulses.  Don’t immediately gratify the child by buying him a toy he wants.  Train him to work for it, save money and to buy one for himself.

2.   It is a matter of choice.  Parents can always help their children stop developing bad habits through self-control.  During the early age, train the child to choose right actions.  Hitting a sibling is a choice to do not because of what has happened.  It’s a virtue to teach a child that nobody can make him mad.  He only becomes angry because he chooses to be angry.  As your child keeps learning self-discipline and control, he’ll have the full understanding that he’s the one in charge of his entire life.  When he fully understands this, he’s giving himself empowerment to boost further his self-control, capabilities and choices in life.

3.   It goes with a prize.  Self-discipline gives various rewards.  Imagine a child who does control himself and work hard on his studies to get “A.” Or a sporty son who rehearses consistent batting and scores a home run.  And how about a child who does not give revenge or beat his sibling? Does he deserve an appreciation from the parents?  In the same extent, all these deeds call for self-control and self-discipline to bring in great rewards. 

Explain to children that most of the rewards and success they earn are generated by self-discipline and self-control.   On the other hand, tell your child that not getting good grades can’t be blamed on a teacher.  Or, a sport’s failure can’t be anyone else’s failure.  It is the child who is responsible for the consequences simply because he has not applied self-discipline.

Self-discipline helps children to develop self-control to suppress their outbursts; it is never relying on people to control them.  That’s why children have no reason to harm themselves as well as others—physically or verbally.  Bear in mind that it is a trait every parent should teach to a child.  Self-discipline is about building up self-control.  


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3 Helpful Tips How to Cope with Teenage Rebellion

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Teenage rebellion is psychologically recognized as a type of behavior that displaces race, status, and culture.  As part of emerging personality for adulthood life, a teenage life undergoes a stage to develop  an individualized identity.  It’s a condition teens want to prove they’re independent enough in making decisions and be responsible for their own actions.  Teenage life may try out various behaviors, roles, or philosophy. And because of these, they may display the advent of teenage rebellion.

Tips to dealing with teenage rebellion

1.   First, determine the original issue why rebellious teens are showing disorder behavior. Or, is rebellion just part of your teenager’s growing up?  There are conflicts that are normal between parents and teenagers, but this can’t be considered as teenage rebellion.  And there are struggles that openly display symptoms of teenage rebellion.  

Concerned parents—in their attempt to get a quick-fix on teenage rebellion—resolve only the shallow part of the problem.  Oftentimes, they miss targeting the root cause of teenage rebellion.  While some conflicts are considered natural, many situations actually indicate a deeper problem like “defiance” and “lack of respect.”  This state is all about a teenager’s life and not the parents'.  You don’t feel it that way if you always receive the outburst of rebellion. But teens only melt down before parents whom they trust, and this is a confirmed scientific fact.

As a result, it is best to identify the main cause of teenage rebellion.  Parents should know if there is the presence of depression.  Or, is there any option for them to take drugs? Can new friends be blamed on this? Or, is teenage rebellion the only way of searching for what is more important—your love and attention?  These serious conditions require appropriate handling. But undoubtedly, learn to figure out the major cause why there is rebellion.

2.   Next, understand that teenage rebellion is not beneficial.  The crucial thing of teens development task is to work out their role as an individual and to keep living self-sufficiently.  If they do challenge your protocol and push your limits, they’re only doing what they think is existing in the real world.  It’s the world that forces them to do self-made judgments for themselves and others.

Parents have all the opportunities to demonstrate ways to manage the lives of their teenagers and to overcome rebellion.  At the same time they can train them to respect other people and authority.  This, though, is difficult to do if you’re bombarded with warfare.  While it may be an exhausting and extended fight, the combat has a good purpose if properly managed.

Avoid ending up with an overwhelming teenage rebellion every now and then. As you see it, their disobedience makes you even more upset.  So keep reminding yourself that the formula is to prepare them to adulthood stage.  Subsequently, this condition of rebellion becomes more bearable for you.

3.   Lastly, abhor the teenage rebellion  but love your teenager.  Majority of teenagers are craving for their parents’ time and attention, even if your mind is saying different thoughts.  How often do you appreciate the good things they do?  Do you talk about their importance and what they want to share with you?  Are you asking them to join in your activities although most of the time they don’t feel like doing it?  Or is it only the acts of teenage rebellion that you often see? All these things are so critical for a teenage life although they may look unimportant to parents. 

Today’s teenage generation would prefer to be appreciated than to fight.  However, teenage rebellion occurs in order to fight than to be ignored. That is why parents are required to demonstrate genuine love and affection rather than focusing on rebellion. Although it may seem effective to them, over time they will end up creating a big difference in their attitude and behavior.


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Risks in Using Internet and Technology – Watch What Your Kids are Doing Online

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As protective parents, we should teach our children the risks in using the internet.  There are risks in talking to someone they don’t know online.  But how we allow them to sit in front of a computer for long hours not knowing who they are conversing with?  Children can easily be influenced by anyone, anytime.  Their young minds are wide-open for risks in using the internet and technology.

The best place to position a personal computer is an open area—like living room—where every member of the family can find way to view the computer’s monitor.  Parents can make suggestions what sites kids should surf to avoid the risks. Part to track their kid’s online activities is by walking around where the computer is installed.  From time to time it is important to see what the kid is doing. The risks of using internet are almost there to devour our children if parents are not alert.

There are dangers when our children surf the net, send messages, or video chat with some strangers online.  Children can reach the internet risks while researching, exploring, playing games or getting entertained online.  Also, when there’s sharing of important information like address, contact number, birth date, or other personal information, that is how troubles continue.  Parents should not feel unworried that their kids are safe from the internet risks although they are inside their home.

Apprehensive parents have the responsibility to ensure that their kids are protected from the risks of technology while online.  Keep in mid, there are more dangers in using the internet than we can realize it.  It is not an excuse that parents are too busy to allow children to surf by themselves only.

When you doubt what your child’s doing online then make careful surveillance.  There are cases where kids instantly cover the monitor with their body when you see them.  They might have gone to discover the risks in using internet making them feel differently. Probably, they are sending or watching unacceptable messages or videos that are private.  In these circumstances you can have a dialogue with your child.  Explain to them what risks and dangers they can get from the internet and technology.  There are many predators whose only purpose is to find prey in internet and small kids are their main target.

Just like adults, children have things to hide while using the internet.  They maybe venting out to a friend that concerns you.  There are also cases they found someone they don’t know.  It is surprising how strangers can make research online for innocent children to be their victims.  These internet risks need immediate intervening of a parent.  We should have the commitment to protect our children every day until they are finally capable of looking after themselves.

Surfing the internet is thrilling and full of fun for children and parents alike.  We don’t allow our kids to read or watch adult contents on magazines or televisions.  Unluckily, there are lots of them in the internet and they are easily accessible any moment.  These are the risks in using internet and technology.  Kids are prone to go to places they are not supposed to be. For protective measures parents may filter or block those sites suspected as inappropriate.


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10 Positive Parenting Tips for Successful Family Living

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Unknown to most parents, an effective positive parenting is a skill that needs time to be developed.  It takes long patience and perseverance before you see huge results.  And along the process are practical tips to carry out the parenting job.

Find below what positive parenting tips are helpful in creating successful family living:

Tip #  1.   Raise the value of playing.  For a small kid, playing is a child’s beautiful world.  A play is critical in every aspect of his total development.  Unfortunately, this is what most parents neglect to do.  A play which is an effective form of positive parenting can prevent behavioral problems.  Play tips give a variety of opportunities to learn naturally.  This is so important in shaping a positive relationship between children and parents.  Oftentimes, it feels so good to act like a child again.  It makes children feel more enjoyable when joined with parents.

Tip # 2.   Create house rules and impose them.  No matter what the age of the child is, specific rules are important in effective positive parenting.  Build up some rules to follow with appropriate consequences if children failed to follow.  Make sure parents are the first ones to comply with it to encourage children to do the same.  House rules make your parenting roles much easier.

Tip # 3.   Pay attention to what your child is saying.  Effective positive parenting uses eye to eye contact and tender touch when dealing with children.  In contrast, using high-pitched voice and provoking words are the enemies of positive communication.  Your children, instead of listening to you, will get annoyed and will answer you back with unpleasant response.  Provide precise instructions, not too much talking that will irritate the child.  Don’t also undermine the value of non-verbal message.  Always hold the hands of your kid to comfort him.  A touch and loving embraces make a big difference.

Tip # 4.   Help improve their body and brain.  Healthy foods are the tips for strong resistance.  As parents, model the good positive habits of eating the right food. Prioritize a variety of nutritious foods to avoid being picky eaters or being sickly.  Positive parenting becomes effective if parents can eat happily with them.  Limit the number of hours watching TV or playing electronic games.  Raise your children’s spirits by doing lots of physical activities: exercise, playing, or helping in household chores.  Always give positive support to their efforts, whether or not they excel in school. Give them many opportunities to explore, try and learn new things.

Tip # 5.   Answer them when they ask you questions.  Make it a habit to always ask questions.  When they’ve grown up, it will be easier for them to communicate with you.  Be positive and show honesty and sincerity when answering them, even the most sensitive matters.  Give the precise “word” and don’t lie.  Children get satisfied with a little knowledge that comes from effective positive parenting.  There’s no need to expand your answer.  Being truthful generates mutual trust as well as respect for parents and others.

Tip # 6.   Watch how your child grows and accept his uniqueness.  The true experts in positive parenting are the parents; they know better their child’s distinctiveness more than anyone else.  Whether it’s intellectual, physical, or in behavioral pattern, parents are the most knowledgeable.  Keep in mind to happily accept your child's uniqueness no matter what he or she is. This is the feature of effective positive parenting: Don’t criticize their individuality.  Be supportive enough in enhancing their talents and interests.  Give ample time to connect with them every day.  And never ever compare them with other kids.  It brings no positive results but only destroys their self-worth and develops low self-esteem.

Tip # 7.   Have a happy, regular family togetherness.  To feel that every member belongs to each other, a family should be involved in common activities.  These tips include meal time together, helping one another doing tasks, or simply playing.  Have time together to talk about problems, needs, or achievements to promote a positive and strong relationship.    An effective time to positive parenting is togetherness.

Tip # 8.   Help your child distinguish right from wrong.  It is a gradual, progressive process to develop good character in your child.  Show in actions the right behavior they should mimic, and not just instructing them. Children learn better when their parents are their role models in real actions, not in words.

Tip # 9.   Don’t forget yourself. A lot of parents just focus all their time to the needs of their children.  Sad to say, they neglect their health, forget to eat, and don’t take care of their appearance anymore.  If you’re doing an effective positive parenting, don't forget yourself.  Consider the tips of taking rest, food, sleep and some sorts of fun and recreation.  Parents need to recharge their strength every day.  Being tired and feeling weak make you ineffective.  Be nice to yourself, give it good treatment and you’ll be more capable to complete your job.

Tip # 10.   Above everything else, let them feel your love.  Loving is the most effective positive parenting skill. Without it, all your efforts turn to nothing.  Whether it’s disciplining or teaching, love must be the motivating factor of parents.  Your unconditional love for them will conquer even the most insurmountable condition. Give love first and your goal of effective positive parenting will follow!

Raising a child is a difficult career to do, but not to parents who know the secrets of effective positive parenting. Being responsible for another child’s life is overwhelming but rewarding.  The least thing you do or do not do can have long-life consequences.  If you want to be great parents your child will be proud of, taking the above positive parenting tips could help.  Ignore these tips or you regret later!!


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10 Basic Principles of Teaching Children the Lessons of Life

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What is your major responsibility as parents for your children? How will you give them education and the important lessons of life? How will you be able to fulfill it? The basic lessons your children should discover must come from you, the parents.  But how prepared are you to teach your children these lessons?

Here are the guidelines that give tips to parents:

1.     Every child is created with a clear purpose.  Your child is born neither by chance nor probability. All parts of his body are complexly designed making the child unique from other children.  As loving parents, it is your obligation to impart them the purpose and core of their existence.

2.     Every child should learn the many different lessons of life.  Your child is bestowed with the willingness, ability to learn as well as the gift to understand.  From birth to death, your child is already signed up to join formal and informal education.    All days in school and home are opportunities to get exposed to discovering new things.  Both have relevant and irrelevant experiences to learn.  In discerning good from evil, help them apply the importance of filtering.  This is something children should not ignore.

3.     Every child will learn lessons from their mistakes.  Experience teaches lessons not taught in school.  It is always the best teacher ever.  Parents have the responsibility to teach their children to grow through trials, errors and experimentations.  

4.     A failure in life is as important as gaining success.  A genuine success comes from a series of failures and lessons of life.  Help children to accept that it’s okay to fail, but no one should stay in that condition forever.  Encourage them to stand up again, be resilient and move on to next stage of their life.

5.     Every child must learn through repetitive procedure.  Every lesson a child learns is repeated until it is fully learned.  The process comes to your children in various forms.  Teach your children that lessons of life are wisdom gained.  Putting into practice what is learned makes the big difference. 

6.     Lessons of life are life-long courses to learn.  Make it clear to your children that as long as they live, they will keep discovering new things.  Finishing a course doesn’t stop them from learning.  Being away from school won’t mean they have graduated.  Every stage, part, area of their life has lessons to learn.  And growing only stops when the heart ceases from beating.  

7.     Encourage them to live one day at a time.  Help them live each day as if it were last.  No child can be the same in various days and time.  No one is in different locations simultaneously.  What they were a couple of years ago won’t be the same today or tomorrow.  Help them and motivate them to do their best today for tomorrow can’t promise any assurance.

8.     Train them to equip plans for their lives.  Teach your children that all the resources they need are available to fulfil their life plans.  Children are given tools, talents, and skills needed to understand the lessons of life.  Guide them to use these tools to their advantage and also to their fellow men.  Use and explore them but not wastefully.  

9.     Help them understand the three perennial questions about life: Where do children come from, why are children here, and where should they be going?   The answers to these questions are considered the toughest knowledge to be learned.  Such is the ultimate message and lessons of life that each child should strive for.  Parents play a major role in helping their children quest for the right answers.

10.    Train your children to share what they have learned.  Kids will forget most of the experiences they gained.  Because of this, they’ve got no choice but to share the lessons of life to others.  Help them unlearn selfishness by giving out what they have.  Light your child’s candle and keep it burning.  When they learn to share and give, none of their good deeds will be forgotten.

Teaching children education and the lessons of life are the quests for true and meaningful living.  This living should become a reality.  Children are born to learn and should pass all the life’s exams, but of course the rewards are always there waiting for them!


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How and When to Use a Rod to Discipline a Child?

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What’s the meaning of using rod to discipline a child?  Is rod really an effective tool of correcting bad behaviors?  What’s the importance and role of a rod to parents and children?

Kids are naturally hungry to please their parents; however, they are not born with the acquired ability to do things right.  This is where a rod can help discipline a child; it plays the role of teaching and shaping a kid.  It also gives wisdom and makes a child sensible.  And parents who fail to do their obligation will also suffer the consequences of their children’s misbehavior.

A passage found in the Bible about rod is in Proverbs 13:24. In a Christian way of living a rod is used to discipline and correct the children’s bad attitudes.  If children don’t experience the consequences of their wrong doing, they won’t understand that bad behaviours need hurt to correct them.

The term “rod” designates a medium-sized, thin stick to bring a reasonable amount of pain without lasting injury.  A kid rationally deserves a rod to discipline him.  On the other hand, no child is worthy of bruises, cuts, or other forms of physical and verbal abuses.  It is also believed that using hands to spank the face is not appropriate.   A hand is designed to love children through touching, embracing and caressing.

Rod is one of the best ways to discipline a child.  Your children may not be afraid of your verbal reprimands, raised voice, punishment or other forms of discipline.  But the rod has a unique feature that moves every kid to respect and obey their parents.  If children see a rod they tend to correct their behavior rather than continue with it.  A rod has many lessons both parents and children can learn from.

Rod also protects a child from further injury.  The part of the body that needs to be beaten is his buttock.
This body part has thick, fleshly mounds that don’t hurt or break the bones.  Avoid beating the other parts like the hands, head, back, legs—these are painful and dangerous.  Buttock is the safest part to beat the child.

To “spare the rod” symbolizes a father or a mother who fails to discipline a child.  Unfortunately, these are the parents who hate their kids in a different perspective.  As wise advice to parents, don’t refuse to give it to discipline a child.  They won’t die with a rod.  It is for their own good to get punished by this stick.  Children who feel sorry about their mistakes and respect higher authority will realize they’re wrong and ask forgiveness.

Part of disciplining children is helping them become accountable for their actions.  Admittedly, children have the pride that blinds them from practicing what is good.  To use a rod does not necessarily mean that parents beat down children into forceful submission.  A rod is used to discipline and at the same time to care and value their children.  It is a parenting tool to become effective parents.

Bear in mind that parents should not over use their authority and power that can inflame the child to develop anger.  Avoid venting out to your kids about your frustrations.  If there’s defiance, use a rod to discipline a child’s bad behaviour but do it with love.

When the child is being disciplined it doesn’t make him happy.  Subsequently, there are rich rewards for discipline.  The value of the rod’s correction gives direction towards developing a winning character.  A kid who is trained on discipline has all the opportunities to go places and succeed in life. Start making a worthwhile goal.  Don’t a spare a rod to discipline a child; it gives them right destiny!!!


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Technology -- 10 Ways to Protect Your Family’s Privacy on Social Networking Websites

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Over the last couple of years, social networking websites like Twitter, Facebook, Digg and others have been extremely emerging in popularity.  Most people are enjoying logging on to these sites, but are the users disclosing more than what is necessary?  Are social networking websites safe for your private information?  Does technology give risks to parents, children and family?

Social Networking Defined

Social networking is the 21st century’s trend in communication.  Primarily, social networking is enjoyable to use. It helps people to get in touch with each other via sharing images and videos, chatting with friends and loved ones, and sharing personal information.  All of these are done on-line. Social networking websites perform as on-line community for internet users.  Account owners share common interest once they start socializing on-line.  It involves having access on other members’ profiles and personal information, probably to even personally call them.

Dangers of Social Networking Websites

Inside the home each member of the family, especially children, can become the predator’s targets. Many strangers and stalkers abuse the use of these sites.  Smart predators can save information about different users.  These are the information always uploaded and input by users making them globally available.  They are subject to theft and can be shared and sold by strangers to other people.

Safety Guidelines for Family Members 

1.   Do only what’s comfortable for you.  Feel good and happy with what you’re doing on social networking websites.  Your peers and other people should not force you in any way to do what they do on-line.  If they put their contact numbers, this does not mean you have to put yours as well.

2.   Think many times before deciding to publish your identifying information.  Some of which may include your complete name, contact numbers, address, or card numbers.  If you wish to upload upload images of your school, home or office, make sure they are needed in your profile.

3.   Choose a user name not related to your private information.  “Peternewjersey” or “georgemarch27” would be very risky choices in social networking websites.

4.   Create another email account, one which does not reveal your real name.  Use this in signing up and receiving email messages.  Anytime you decide to stop your connection, it is easy for you to stop using that email account.  You can create your account with Gmail, Hotmail or Yahoo Mail.  There are, however, other existing providers you can choose from.  

5.   Always use passwords that are strong. It is highly recommended to use combinations of numbers and letters.  

6.   Always log off each time you leave social networking websites.  Your profile should be kept closed all the time.  Only trusted friends should be allowed to get access to your profile.

7.   Everything that goes on-line will stay on-line.   Avoid unnecessary chatting or publishing images and video clips that are embarrassing.  Keep in mind that once information is published, you can’t hold it back anymore.  You may have deleted it, but older versions still exist on other computers.  In general, any words you don’t want to speak against anyone, never say them on-line.

8.  Don't ignore privacy settings. Learn more to master social networking websites. These are options to restrict unfamiliar persons whose purpose is to access your profile.  Always scrutinize the people you would accept as friends before joining them to your network community.

9.   Be very cautious about phishing (identity theft) scams where strangers lead users to  imitate websites in order to divulge private information like passwords and usernames.

10.  Trust your own judgement. If you think you or your children are being endangered by other online users, report the incident to a police including the social networking websites.  You or your family members could be spared from the hands of people seeking only for prey. 


Social networking websites have the “friends of friends” feature.  After sharing your peculiar information, you can regularly communicate within a community or across the world.  While your circle of friends becomes larger, family members will also increase publicity to strangers.  These are people who have other intentions. 

There are always stalkers around the web who steal information and identity.  Children, parents and everyone are vulnerable to this condition.  For wise advice, take into consideration the above guidelines.  They will help you enjoy activities on social networking websites, and avoid some of the risks of technology.


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Technology -- 10 Ways to Protect Your Family’s Privacy on Social Networking Websites  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children

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Discipline: How Can Parents Teach Good Manners to their Children

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      Well it's again time to get a refresher course on discipline because the traditional manners your parents taught you are back in the track.  More mothers now are returning to old-schools just to be able to teach good manners to their children.


More surprising though most mothers give feedback that Dads are no longer in charge of discipline at home, giving only concentration on playing. Dads forget that they also have the responsibility to teach good manners to children. This has been happening over the last fifteen years.  While women of this generation have become more independent and stronger, they've ended up doing everything.  They are the only ones bringing up the kids while fathers have neglected their roles.  Women now have careers just like men.

To teach good manners to children should be about teamwork with moms. However, dads often get home late at night.  What most mothers want now is a return to the old-fashioned values of the former time because they see discipline and respect for authority eroded at school and in society.

Listed are some behavioral tips for mothers to teach good manners to their children. When we say mother, it is not only for mothers but for fathers also.  Here are what both of them should teach:

1)  Give clearer information

Instead of criticizing and embarrassing your child about his bad manners tell them how to behave and why. They need to know what good manners do.  Good manners are about making people feel at ease and comfortable with you.  Say for instance, It's good to flush your loo because it's nicer for the next person.

2) Tell it off later

Scolding your children for not saying 'thank you' or 'sorry' in public can rebound. If they have been embarrassed and felt resentful, either way they’ll do this:  they will disregard what are saying or they do something worse to gain more attention.  Keep your composure and discuss the matter with them later at home.

3) Sympathize with your child

For sure, your kid must have a valid reason for his bad behavior.  For example, he may have thrown away the magazines because someone grabbed his much-loved toy.  So try to discover how they feel about that also.  If parents sympathize with the child, they will teach the kid good manners and understand his feelings.  More often, this will encourage corrective behavior.

4) Say nice comments

One of the most effective ways to teach good manners to a child is by encouraging him when he does something good.  A person can create some nice comments for him when the child acts nicely.  If they hear you say, 'Thanks for the nice prayer, tomorrow you do the same before we eat our dinner.’  A child will be more motivated to repeat the same act.

5) Be precisely detailed

Rather than focusing on the bad manner your child may have done, point out on one action they did right, this is to help build their self-confidence.  For instance, 'I liked how you greeted and smiled at Mrs. Bridges when she came in.  Probably, next time you could say a warm ‘hello, Mrs. Bridges’ to her.

6) Immediate Praise

This is best during table manners.  On the part of the parents this may be hard, but ignore as much as you can any bad behavior and then give immediate praise when they stop.  If they are eating with their open mouth and producing terrible eating noise, give them attention only the moment they stop.  Once again, your control over your impulses is important in order to teach good manners to children.

7) Use right expectations only

Children are young and aren't adults.  What adult parents can do is precisely the opposite of what children can.   So it's obviously unfair to anticipate that they behave well. Parents must understand that it is unrealistic to sit them calmly for hours.  Nor can children be on their most well-behaved condition each time you entertain a visitor.

8) Be ready

An effective way to motivate right manners is to inform them on something beforehand. If a visitor is expected to come and you understand children may become bored, say, “It's important to feel comfortable, give a smile, say hi and converse for a few minutes.”

9) Seek for a child’s explanation

One of the practical tips to strengthen good manners and habits is to ask a child the answers for himself.   A child is likely to follow them through.  For example, if your little son has physically hurt a girl, ask him what he must do.  His suggestion could be to say “I’m sorry for what has happened.” 

10)   Don’t forget about consequences

If your child has done something wrong you can't ignore, you may intimidate consequences.   You carry them through if it is necessary. So if he keeps banging on a drum while adults are discussing, say that you’ll get rid of the drum if he goes on.

One of the best ways to teach good manners is by encouraging more your child when they do good things. Teaching them about manners involve both the husband and the wife.  With oneness of goal and techniques to carry out the common goal, it is not hard to raise and discipline children with good manners and behaviors.