Showing posts with label Children Parents. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Children Parents. Show all posts

Parents cannot Force Children to Study: Train them to Improve Good Study Habits

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Parents can’t and should not push their children to study.  Unfortunately, scolding, nagging and threatening won’t improve good study habits.  What kids should understand is that they are the ones responsible for their own studies and homework.

Sad to say, kids are not born with the great study habits  required for them to succeed in school. This is one thing they need to learn gradually.  Normally, children start studying without the developed skills to do well.


How Education Pressures Children and Parents?

As observed, this modern generation offers a complex approach for educational system.  More books are read, daily homework given, monthly exams, projects, additional curricular activities and others that burden the kids.  We’ve been seeing them dragging books and bags heavier than they could carry.  Imagine a young 7-year-old kid is bombarded with much study pressures and tasks he does not deserve.  This was not the case many generations ago.

On the part of the parents, teaching a grade school child causes much anxiety, fighting, and long hours of scolding.  And the result?  Physical and emotional exhaustion both to parents and children. Worse, parents did not help kids to improve good study habits.




In order to cope with what modern education gives, it is very important to develop and improve good study habits. Here are some helpful keys:


1.   Start the habit early. Parents can start displaying good examples for their kids long before they go to school.  Read to your children every day.  Skills in reading are so significant if you want them to succeed in school.  Frequent reading helps kids to build up interest for reading a variety of subjects.


2.   Have a fixed schedule. Parents need to make a decision what time of the day homework should be done, then stick to it.  While kids are in the lower grades, an hour each day is possibly enough to start and improve their good study habits.  Added time would be necessary as homework increases.   Kids need to understand they are capable of making decisions for their studies.  If there’s no homework on a given day, use this fixed time to read or work on long term projects.  Remember, your goal is to help children improve good study habits.  So don’t miss studying although there’s no homework.


3.   Have a conducive study area.  Parents should provide a comfortable study area—same place for each day. There should be no distractions in children's focus.  Keep away from TV, computers, phones, gadgets, toys—anything that will capture their attention.  These are not helpful to improve their good study habits.


4.   Be there to help.  You must have time to immediately answer questions.  You should give information without really doing the homework for them. Parents should train their children study skills they need.


5.   Provide strength.  Parents, why can’t you praise your children for exerting efforts for their homework?  You’re so quick to reprimand if they do wrong and yet too lazy to praise them if they do good.  Bear in mind, though, that homework is not all the time fun, so don’t expect perfection.  In time, they will improve their good study habits.


6.   Provide children the responsibility for their own homework.  Let kids suffer the consequences if they  have failed to do their assignment.  Your role as parents is to give support.  What is important is that they understand the value of education to become more responsible.


7.   If the method doesn’t work, try another approach.  If the plan does not help, simply change it.  Two shorter study periods each day may be easier than a longer one.  Early evening study may help better than an immediately after-school study.  Parents and kids should plan with the right schedule until they come about with one that works best.

Always keep in mind that children must learn to be responsible for their own education.  Parents can create a big difference by giving them learning tools for education. How to stimulate a child's mind should be the priority of every parent.  There's no stressful and difficult life for children who have been trained to improve good study habits.


Parents cannot Force Children to Study: Train them to Improve Good Study Habits  is a post on Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children



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Facing and Coping with Family Issues

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 No formal training is required for parenthood and coping with family issues.  The only absolute pre-requisite is physical maturation, which does not ensure emotional or intellectual readiness for parenthood.  Many parents feel truly shocked when they first realized the commitment involved in raising children.

Newly married couples face the task of integrating the differing roles and habits carried over from their families.  They need to create a mutually acceptable environment for their own home.  They need to look at their upbringings and decide which features of them they want to recreate for their children.


Coping with Many Family Issues

Through trial and error, we discover how to deal most effectively with our children at various ages and stages.  As soon as we feel even slightly competent with one phase, our children seem to leap into an entirely different phase.  The trial-and-error process quickly begins again.

Couples may have long discussions about what their family life with children is going to be like.   While it is impossible to anticipate all of the various problems that the give-and-take of family life creates, the lives of the parents cover the common family issues that normally happen to a family.


Common Factors that Cause Family Issues

If family issues start to trouble the relationship, work together on a plan of reducing conflicts. Here are some common factors triggering family issues:

      1.   The reality—as opposed to the dreams and plans—depends on many factors, including each child’s personality, the influence of relatives and friends, and the parents’ relationship with each other. 

          2.     Much stresses such as financial problems will dramatically cause family issues and affect life and relationship. 
                                            
      3.    The birth of an additional child who has a unique personality.  The situation adds to the complexity of family  issues and family relationships.  
     
       4.    All within the same day, both parents and kids can display hostility, hatred, resentment for each other causing much troubling family issues.

      5.   Consequently, moving from theory into practice is often more complicated than anyone could have anticipated.

There’s nothing wrong with the feelings of conflicting emotions about the people who are most important to us--our spouse and children.  When we, parents, accept the existence of this wide range of family issues, we then can accept it in those we love.  Be wise enough to handle family issues as they will help improve or destroy the relationships.


Facing and Coping with Family Issues  is a post on  Modern Parenting Tips. . .


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When Parents Quarrel – Common Effects Children Experience

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When parents quarrel they affect their children in unhealthy ways. When they fight and get hurt by words, they tend to say and do something equally hurting.  Often, they do worse things to the other person.  Although parents may regret the effects it brings, the damage has been done to children. Rather than filling the house with love and unity, they find a dungeon-like home, cold and dark. Lots of parents who quarrel just keep the marriage despite frequent disagreements, completely destroying the home's harmony.

What happens to kids when parents quarrel?
1.   Feelings get hurt. Children do have fragile hearts. It hurts them deeply to watch their parents quarrel. The effects become worse when the conflict concerns about the children.
2.   Feelings of insecurity. The atmosphere around the children’s home becomes unsafe. They start to feel insecure because of the hazardous and harmful effects caused by quarrels.     
3.  Hostility effects among children. When parents have arguments usually it involves resentments, anger, and exchange of hurtful words.  If parents are not careful at all, the bad effects could lead the child’s astray. This is how conflicts between parents could go far.   
4.   Poor communications. Members of the family refrain from speaking.  Lack of communication dominates, because one person is anxious to express himself to the other members. Then other may turn bitter towards the next.  The outcome effects are extended to the entire family.   

5.   Effects are not kept secret. When parents quarrel, no matter how much they try to keep it, the effects will eventually be revealed.  Children suffer much about it since they’re unprepared and sensitive.
 When your parents fight what are the effects at home?
1.   Kids logically look up to their parents; they feel that one day they’ll be like their dad or their mom. How their little hearts shrink when their role models are seen quarreling instead of loving.  When parents quarrel, the effects could poison the home’s ambiance. A mom and a dad, even with no intention, would hurt their innocent kids.  It is discouraging and traumatic for kids to watch and hear their parents always quarrel.
2.   Psychologists state that kids often put the blame on themselves.  They think their parents are fighting because of them.  And the effects to the kids? They feel they are bad that’s why their parents quarrel every day. Without knowing the bad effects, parents will burden their kids with remorse as consequences of their frequent disputes.
 3.   It is even worse when a mom or a dad (after a quarrel)  forces the kids to take sides.   One partner may talk about the shortfall of the other partner in an attempt to win the kids' empathy. Sociologists say that  kids who grow up in homes where parents quarrel a lot have the effects of becoming argumentative spouses when they get married.
 Generally, no parents have intentions to harm their kids, but often things happen just as they should like when parents quarrel.  Fighting in front of your children will have serious effects. When bad effects happen, gentle explanations to children are important to get rid of clouds and doubts in their minds.  Responsible parents must show love and care by trying their best to save their children and avoid the “parents quarrel.”


When Parents Quarrel - Common Effects Children Experience  is a post on Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children



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Is Technology and Internet Giving Risks or Help to Parents & Children

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Has the fast development of technology and internet made parenting jobs more difficult or easier?  Are parents and children facing some risks or help?  Does this modern world require some changes in the way we should fulfill our parenting roles?
No doubt, parenting has always been the most challenging of all our endeavors and this will keep continuing through the coming generations. Technology and internet has made the lives of parents and kids in advanced changes along with some risks.  The effects of technology and internet are here to stay.


Some Risks of Technology & Internet
  1. Obviously the rise in technology and internet has left parents and kids with problems and risks of stalking, embarrassment, computer addictions, large  phone and gadget bills.

  2. Young kids become sedentary in life as they fix their eyes on screens.  They have no time playing around and outdoors.  The risks:  they can make kids overweight or sick because of insufficient physical activities.    

  3. While means of communications becomes quicker between parents and kids, there’s no intimacy and personal touch along with it.  Parents’ real expressions of love to children are missing and at risks because they are replaced by gadgets and devices.  

 Some Help of Technology & Internet
  1. Putting aside the risks, technology and internet brings a huge wealth of information to both parents and children.  On the part of students, doing research is just at the tip of their fingers.

  2. Within a family, the networking sites have given parents the insights about where their children go and what they do.  With the help of technology and internet parents can discover what their kids are discussing about and who they are talking to.

  3. Kids with divorced parents enjoy the advantages of keeping in touch via texting or Facebook.  This medium of technology and internet is a comforting way to relieve the pain caused by divorce.

  4. Long distance calls in Skype have made it easier for divorced couples to make connections as well as for their kids.

  5. Parents need to educate themselves about the on-line risks  while monitoring their kids' activities.  Parents need to encourage kids to take advantage of  this technology for best benefits but be cautious about the risks.

Often, the things in life that bring us joy may become dangerous with risks if done in unhelpful manners.  There is so much to gain from this online world and the developments of the present age.  Parents need to educate kids to prevent the risks, misuse and overuse of this technology and internet.
In this present time, what are your positive and negative experiences when it comes to parenting associated with technology and internet?  This digital time has already begun with some help and risks and these will go on to change our lives continuously as parents.
How do you think about it?  Is technology and internet giving you more risks than help for your family?  Is it more beneficial to parents and children or not?  Personally, you can answer these by taking time to think about the risks and effects of technology and internet in your own life.
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How TV Affects Your Children -- Tips on Parents about TV Programs

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Today is the generation where media affects children and parents are incredibly caught by surprise.  Movies, TV programs, music, internet, mobile phones, other gadgets—all of which have invaded and influenced the lives of many people all over the world.   Kids in particular are the ones benefiting most from this.  A couple of questions to ask: How television affects children? Are the present TV programs good or bad for them?  What is the great impact of TV to children—from local to national to global type of TV programs?

Issues related to TV programs 

First.  Research studies do indicate that quarreling in TV programs can encourage critical physical behavior in young kids.  On TV programs, this is portrayed as acceptable behavior.  By watching these actions, television affects children; they become less sensitive to it in general.

Second.  Kids see hundreds of TV commercials each week.  Few parents could or should buy all the products that commercials teach children to want.  This is one way how television affects the children.

Third.  If television is set is on all the time, TV programs watching can easily become a habit that is hard to break.  Kids need a lot of leisure-time hours to explore on other activities rather than on TV programs alone.


What should parents do?

1.   What parents need to do is limit the amount of time children spend watching TV programs, to avoid them spending too many passive hours.  Don't let long hours on television affects your children.

2.   They need also to monitor the quality of the TV programs.  A number of TV programs are filled with useful information and provide excellent opportunities for the kids, but others prompt undesirable thoughts and feelings in children.

3.   Kids differ from each other in their reactions to the same show, depending on their particular sensitivities or reactions to what they’re watching.  This is also one major factor how TV affects the children.

4.   Be alert to those TV programs that seem to prompt negative responses in your kids, such as excessive anxiety, sleeplessness, bad dreams, increased fears, or stronger behavior.

5.   Tell them how television affects children and what will be the right programs to watch.  Consequently, they will understand why you are restricting their TV programs viewing.


Make TV programs advantageous to Kids

1.   Help them to be critical and evaluate the TV programs they do see.  This will increase their thinking skills and help them to be less gullible.  This way, television affects children positively.

2.   Ask how they would feel if they were treated the way some of the characters are treated.  Tell them when you find something unbelievable on TV programs and seek their opinions.

3.   Many serious problems are presented, explored, and resolved within the brief time block of TV programs.  Discuss how rarely this would happen in real life. Explain them how television affects children like them.

4.   When your kids ask for products seen on TV programs or commercials, buy one and let them compare the difference between what the ads promise and what they actually deliver.  Commercial on television affects children.

Parents should have active participation to know how television affects their children.  As responsible parents, you can make it an enriching experience for them.  With your guidance, your kids can become informed consumers. You can actually teach, train and discipline them by being selective in TV programs they’re watching!


How TV Affects Your Children : Tips on Parents about TV Programs
is a blog post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children


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    Children Parents Relationship -- Tips to Making Kids Feel Special

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    Will your children suffer because they have a busy working mom? Will children be deprived of time and love? Is children-parents relationship one of the big family issues now? 

    Many successful and happy people have been brought up by career moms. So having a busy mom is not a guarantee that children will be left unattended. What they do and don’t do will depend on the outcome of the children and parents relationship.  Parents should understand if a busy career becomes a stepping stone or a stumbling block that obstructs children parents relationship.

    There’s no truth to say that children whose mom works are more deprived than those whose mom is inside the home.  Often, stay-at-home mothers are busy like anyone in this world.  If they feel guilty and worried that their children are deprived, most likely the children will feel the same.

    No matter how hard it is to improve children and parent relationship, offer opportunities to progress and learn. Highlight on those opportunities to make the best of your present opportunities then make kids feel they’re special: 


    Keys to Expressing Busy Mom’s Love

    1.   Express your love through hugging and kissing.  It’s the fastest and easiest way to show your love.  No matter how hectic your schedules are, there is always time for this 4-second kisses and hugs.  Make it a significant kiss and tight embrace to both lift your spirits and improve your children parents relationship. 

    2.   A hug and a kiss could be the most powerful action to stop bad behaviors.  Try this next time you feel exhausted or your kid’s whining.  Do this in the morning, when you go back home, a number of times in the evening, a warmer and longer one just before bed.  In children and parents relationship these are most needed.


    Schedule Weekly Family Togetherness & Meeting 

    1.   Thirty minutes each week is a little relationship time investment yet with huge payoffs.  Children feel they’re special when parents listen to them and when their ideas and suggestions are recognized.  This is the instant payoff.   

    2.   The other payoff is that children and parents can resolve many day-to-day troubles and family issues during the meeting. Your children can help do morning and bedtime routines and show up creative manners of managing chores.  Modern children are much more willing to implement on plans they have helped create.

    3.   The long-term payoff is that kids are trained for life and communication skills including problem solving skills. It takes less time to schedule weekly family meetings from which kids learn to assist and work out on relationships and problems.  On the contrary, it may create family issues when lecture, nag, and reprimand are given focus.

     
    Ask for Children’s Help

    Today, children and parents relationship is very crucial. What kids want is to feel needed by their parents.   It is much different when you ask for help in a nice way rather than reprimanding or lecturing. "I would be thankful for anything you can do to clean up the room before going to bed" is more effective than saying, "How many times did I tell you not to scatter all your stuff?" Kids feel good when they can help in their parent’s multi-tasking jobs. They don't feel special when they are being scolded and put down.
     

    Give Short Special Notes

    Write a 2-minute note for your child's pillow, lunch bag, or mirror.  One very busy mom made a decision to place a note inside the lunch bag of her daughter daily for one year.  While aboard on a plane, she would take time to write few notes such as “Every day, I think of you, I wish I were with you, I love you, Sweetie." She would give the notes to childcare person to put it in the lunch bag every day.  Her daughter felt incredibly special.

    Being busy because of multi-tasking jobs should not be one of the family issues. Helping kids feel special is a matter of being creative in your children parents relationship.  It must involve a creative habit but not lack of time in relationship.  The benefits of doing it regularly is to ensure that your children feel they're very special!   


    Children Parent Relationship -- Tips to Making Kids Feel Special  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children
      
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